Although alcohol sales are down with almost everything else these days, Absolut Vodka wants to show it’s doing everything possible to remind people to drown their sorrows responsibly during the recession — the company has launched a massive digital ad campaign that covers everything from Facebook to text messages and reminds people to “recognize the moment” when they’ve had one screwdriver too many (although experts insist the company is actually just out trolling for youthful customers); meanwhile, NPR reports that stimulus-package-related scams are on the rise, and cites instances of websites posing as government entities asking for your information and a small “underwriting fee” so they can send you your payment; and in Maryland, police have witnessed an increase in citations given for illegal fishing and attribute the trend to fisherman trying to make ends meet during hard times — most of the crimes have been classified as “striped bass-related” or “possibly striped bass-related.” -SS